Dealing with Kids Not Wanting to Go to Class

I hear it all the time.  "My kid is giving me trouble when it's time to head to class!  Once we get here, they have fun, but sometimes...the struggle is real!"

First off, don't worry.  Like I said, I hear this all the time and it is a common problem. 

I remember resisting going to practice myself when I was a child.  It is all a part of growing up, becoming disciplined, and beginning to recognize priorities, which are all crucial elements in a developing child.

However, there are a few parenting tips that can make this process easier:

1.  PRE-FRAME:  Let them know in the morning as you are getting ready for the day.  "We have Martial Arts tonight after school."  Let them know what the afternoon will look like, what your expectations are, and anticipate as much of the routine as possible.  We all do a lot better when we know what to expect and what is expected of us.  It's no different for kids :)

Take it one step further if you are leaving from home and give them 15, 10, and 5 minute warnings.  "Hey, we are out the door in ____ for martial arts.  Get to a good stopping point with X,Y,Z and make sure you are ready to go!"

2.  FOCUS on the +'s:  After class conversations are a part of the process.  If your child anticipates a rough ride home with criticism following their performance, they will be naturally reticent to head out.  Keep things focused on their successes in general, and if you ever need to bring up a behavior from class that needs to be improved, it will resonate even more!

3. Attitudes are CONTAGIOUS:  Show your enthusiasm for going to watch them train.  Kids are eager to please and if you let them know how excited you are for class, they will be more likely to resist less.  The opposite is also true.  It is hard to get everyone ready to get out the door, and I appreciate the work parents put in!  However, if we let the stress show, kids will pick up on it and parrot our sentiments.

4. EMPATHIZE:  "I know you're tired and had a long week.  I hit that wall sometimes too and it can be tough to get over it."  Leave it at that!  All we are trying to do is communicate that we get what they are feeling.  They should already know what the expectation is; get in the car!  But, letting them know you feel with them will go a long way to easing their resistance.  It also takes their objections away.  You articulated it for them.

Every kid and every house is different, and none of these will fit everyone tool bag.  Grab the one that feels the best and add it to your kit!

Get them to  class, we'll handle the rest.

Master Jared E Circle